The Pleasure House by Kitty Thomas

Author:Kitty Thomas [Thomas, Kitty]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Burlesque Press
Published: 2020-12-01T18:30:00+00:00

40

She still couldn’t believe this was happening, that she had given in to Gabe’s crazy demands. Her mind went back to Brian’s dungeon and how very close she had been to losing her protection in the house. Once she’d finally agreed to the arrangement with Gabe the previous night, she had been sure that he would start… what? Raping her?

A tear slipped down her cheek. No, he wasn’t like that. That wasn’t what this was. He said he would go slow—and she did want him. God help her but she did.

When they reached the room, Gabe’s rumbling voice was low in her ear, “Please relax. I know you’re scared. I won’t hurt you. This won’t be like what happened to you before at Dmitri’s.”

She nodded, not trusting her voice, and allowed him to guide her into the bedroom. He shut and locked the door behind them, which caused her anxiety to skyrocket again.

“So we won’t be disturbed. You want us to have privacy, right?”

“Y-yes, Master,” she whispered. It was true, she didn’t want Phyllis or Anton or worse, Brian to walk in on them. She was sure she was about to be naked.

“G-Gabe?” She was afraid he would be mad at her for saying his name, but she needed to feel like he was still him.

He pulled her into his arms and gently stroked her back. “Yes, sweetheart?”

Good, he wasn’t mad about the slip. It gave her the courage to continue. “I-I do want you. I don’t know if I want this thing we’re going to do. I think it’s possible I might. I thought a lot about what happened in the dungeon, and you’re right, it was a weird reaction. Please… be patient with me. I’m so scared that it will feel like...”

Like forced prostitution.

He pressed a kiss against her forehead. “Shhh. I know. And I can’t promise you won’t have feelings like that. The question is, are you willing to work through them to find peace and happiness on the other side?”

“I-I think so.”

“Do you think I can make you happy? If you can get past your fears?” he asked quietly.

“Yes.” Julie was surprised by how sure she was of this. She’d spent so much time scared of what things might feel like and if she would have flashbacks and how bad the trauma would be. She’d been trying to figure out how she would cope with Gabe’s touch.

She hadn’t stopped to consider that the issue wasn’t Gabe. It would be like this with anyone, in the most normal relationship. At Dmitri’s she’d spent most of her time trying to block what was happening to her and the fear that she could be killed at any moment if she displeased a client enough. They’d already been practically starving her.

Somehow, being at Gabe’s house had only heightened her anxiety because she had time to think about it. Her life wasn’t in immediate danger. She didn’t have to constantly try to cope with and survive the next thing, and that had only made it feel like her emotional world would fall apart at any moment.

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